Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Wall Street Crashes; Invest in Comic Books!

As the ongoing bloodbath on Wall Street continues to wipe ludicrous amounts of money out of existence and prompts many Amercian billionaires to consider pawning their 24K gold toilet seats and skipping the poodle's next pedicure appointment -- savvy business analysts are trying to think outside the box, attempting to avoid being crushed flat by this staggering, savagely wounded market's next lurch. While the Dow Jones, TSX, FTSE, Hang Seng and other global markets are pummeled by a nasty team-up of hope & despair, panic & profit-taking, rallies & crashes -- it's left up to this commentator to wonder... how long before the weary investor looks to other fields in search of sane and stable investments? And when he does... why not go with comic books?

Consider the potential! For instance, there are a finite number of Amazing Fantasy #15s out there -- there could be no conveiveable problems with faulty government fiscal policy helping to inflate price bubbles while simultaneously flooding the marketplace with new ones built on heavy subsidies, cheap labour and undeserved credit. Go with comic books and there would be nothing like the trouble you've been having trying to apply a real-world value to the interconnected contracts tied up with your opaque hedge fund investments -- just a quick look for yellowed pages, torn-out ads, folded corners and dings on the spine and you'd know where you stand. Forget about cheap commercial paper -- keep an eye out for DC Comics' array of late 80s/early 90s titles printed on crisp, heavy Baxter paper. The illustrations practically jump off the page... which has got to be better than jumping off the upper mezzanine of the NYSE and onto the unforgiving trading floor below, right?

So, um... with all that in mind... anybody want to buy fifty copies of Rob Liefeld's X-Force #1 off me?

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